Inner Compass: Emotions, Essentials, and Endurance

As 2023 slips into the second quarter, I’m recognizing how much I’ve changed and grown this year. I’m actively not rushing anything, even blog posts. In fact, it took me three drafts to write this one, thanks to meditating on clarity. Such pondering reminded me to focus on my word for the year, inner compass. And though SO MUCH has happened in the last few weeks, I’m staying present-minded. I don’t have to stuff everything into one post, as this is the fourth of twelve inner compass posts. As I shared in my values statement, I choose how and when to share. So, what, who, where, and when is driving my inner compass? I’ll dive into energy and emotions, as those essentially drive me.

I re-read Essentialism, too, and so other questions abound, and I’ve begun answering some of them. You too can ask yourself these questions. What (easily, affordably) brings me joy? How can I take care of myself so I am challenged just enough while also enjoying stability? Where do my talents for systems/organization, data, and marketing/communications shine? Why are so many of these skills allocated to resources, such as time, space, and energy? In other words, why am I so focused on work? How can I create spaces to sit, play, and grow?

I’m an INFJ-A and have so much energy and emotions for what’s happening now and in the future.

My introversion and intuition have led me to protect my energy, and so I have learned how and when to share my personal life with others. In other words, I’m talking less and aiming to listen. In addition, as someone who struggles with hearing, crowded environments like bars drain my energy. And so I have decided to stop drinking, at least for the rest of the month. I spent the first 6 weeks of 2023 sober, gaining peace of mind. I remembered the smallest of details and lost a little weight, too. Yes, I know I don’t need to lose weight, but protecting my brain and body now will help me later, helping me focus on what/who/where I value.

And I value my independent time. As a result of protecting my time and space, I am currently not dating. So many dates revolve around being “on” and I’d rather work on myself. I now have a handful of evenings and weekends to myself, and I am so hopeful for what’s to come. This time has led to more work, such as PawsCo, dog-sitting, editing this website, and examining my relationship with my alma mater, Ripon College. But I am working on play, too. Rediscovering play as a workaholic was (and is) difficult as dropping work-as-worth is no small feat. I’m still working on it. Play currently looks like doing stuff with no agenda. I’m… Reading FUN books. Taking myself dancing (thanks, Miley)! Going to art galleries. Planning camping weekends, concerts, tattoos, and even sports(ball) outings. Meeting fellow Ripon alums. Talking on the phone more.

Enthusiasm may look like extraversion to some, but my zeal comes from feelings of belonging and understanding, whether I’m alone or with others. When I’m speaking with someone and we bounce and build ideas off of one another, it is one of the most satisfying feelings! Sometimes this sharing isn’t work related, such as comparing playlists or educational experiences. Such sharing led to remembering old favorites, like Max Frost. And though I am not dating, it is wonderful to try new things with friends, such as exploring churches and synagogues. While this last one might inform some Omit to Commit research, I’m actively focused on how I feel within these environments, such as Easter Sunday at a Catholic church with Karl and Julia. I felt simultaneously confused, joyful, and focused, as it’s been years since I tried that denomination. Ultimately, I’m grateful to have gone to church with friends!

Occasionally, my enthusiasm (and penchant for work) does lead to capitalistic collaboration, too. My roommate Sam and I went to an emergency pet training together. It was wonderful to learn new-to-me techniques, such as where to place my palms during CPR on different breeds of dogs. Plus, we caught up over gluten-free, peanut-free, and vegan treats. Smoothies, hummus, and cookie dough balls make an excellent lunch, thank you very much. Clean, plant-based eating has been a goal since January, and Sam and I value veganism AND sharpening our side hustles.

My core enthusiasm comes from independent brain-stretching, too. Lately, both my grid notebook and sketchpad have been filled with business propositions, lists of USPs, Omit to Commit chapters, and charts. I love that each book is dedicated to business and creativity. From visiting the library weekly to daily reading before bed, my brain is tapping into one key thing I desire, to be surrounded by more creative, independent thinkers and makers. Happily, this has led streamlining business and creative pursuits.

Excitement wanes, and so my ultimate personal and professional goal is to feel engaged and empowered in everything I do. Flow, therefore, is a combination of these two emotions. Feeling empowered often comes from doing satisfying, albeit challenging work. And “work” doesn’t have to be a financial transaction; personally, I can find flow when I’m reading or running. Professionally, I feel flow when I’m editing a video or paper, when I’m writing a feelings-driven piece (such as the first draft of a poem), and when I’m digging into data. Qualitative data, especially personal, lived experiences, matter. Quantitative metrics may seem easier to measure and are also essential data points. I am gifted in the art and science of seeing patterns in both kinds of data, and so I excel at systemizing and organizing. It is all information. And so I’m excited to share my essential intent:

I am The Maker’s Marketer, and my essential intent is to help creatives make sense of metrics AND marketing.

I want to help creatives feel agency in doing good work, helping them focus on their art and also see it must be expressed too. Art matters, but it does not just stop at the page, canvas, screen, stage; it needs to go into other people’s lives! As both a maker and marketer myself, I can help other creatives see trends in current and potential audiences, guide them on what advertising, press, and platforms to focus on, and help them NOT feel gross on marketing their art.

It took me YEARS to discover my intention of helping fellow artists with both the back and frontends of marketing (what works, what doesn’t, who, why, etc.). As a data fiend, I can help find specific niche(s) for targeting, whether it’s choosing to run ads, attend a market, or consider other versions of a piece, based off of qualitative and quantitative data. Writing is my cardinal medium, and I can also write ads, emails, social posts, you name it. As a mentor, too, I can guide creatives through the MANY hurdles of selling and marketing, without feeling gross, capitalistic, or fearful of selling out. I’ve been marketing for 10 years and making since I was 3, apparently the only toddler at daycare to organize colorful cotton balls in a row to form a caterpillar. And so my love for streamlining data, marketing, and creativity just makes sense!

Who are the essential audiences/artists?

I have a lot of goals for the year, but I have to remember my essential intent: Helping creatives share their stories. Discovering this intent has taken much of my time, but it uses so many of my talents and can do so much good for the world! Not only am I slowly rebranding myself through this Maker’s Marketer slogan, I’m making a business card and professional packages. My /work webpage will get a refresh, and I’ve reorganized my digital portfolio. More importantly, I am focused on helping specific people:

• I want to amplify womxn’s voices
• As someone who struggles with hearing, sight, and walking, I can help artists with various abilities, from physical disabilities to neurodivergencies
• Artists within the LGBTQIA+ community need support

Of course, I can help more people, but these identities I most relate to. As a white woman, I am constantly working to be anti-racist, but I will never fully understand the lives of BIPOC. In addition, I recognize that my experiences with disability and ability are different than others’ and am only learning now on how to share my story. Fundamentally, I believe our differences make us beautiful and unique! While I can help everyone, know that bigots will not be tolerated, and I am an ally, liberal, and feminist.

Additionally, I don’t think my essential intent is to build an empire, per se; instead, it’s to help share messaging and marketing of those who have traditionally gone unnoticed. By focusing on marketing the work of artists and agents of change, more messages of inclusivity and creativity will exist! And female, divergent thinkers are my key audiences, both online and for my book. This should not feel like something new, if you know me, and it’s not unlike my Womxn in Progress creative spotlights.

Similarly, my essential intent of helping makers with marketing reminds me to hone in on my target audience for my Omit to Commit book. Dedicating so much time on resources and groups has helped streamline the blog posts/chapters, but I can’s forget the audience of the book. The audience is overachievers who need help figuring out what to omit and commit to. But what if I hyper-focused on artists? Would that be too specific? I’d like to hear your thoughts!

An essential intent is focused on the highest good, and while it may seem like I’ve shared a lot of professional work, from dog-sitting to book-drafting to maker-marketing, all of this has taken time, resources, and energy. And that space to rest and reflect is crucial, even if it doesn’t land on this website. Omitting dating, alcohol, and animals from my diet helped me see what and where to focus on. And that’s the last part of today’s “inner compass” post: endurance.

Endurance is essential in choosing what/where/who to focus on.

I am sincerely trying to share what I’ve learned in the right environments, like this here website. Taking up space online, even occasionally sharing to social, such as my new Instagram just for Omit to Commit. Even sharing so much within this post is a public, courageous endeavor! Collaborations can complicate; they can also create connections (when alliteration calls, I answer). But in all seriousness, I only know if my essential intent makes sense and works when I hear from others, so please engage via comment, text, email, or social. I will continue to endure through these Inner Compass, Omit to Commit, and Goals Progress Reports blog posts, as this content calendar is something I value, a regular routine. I am what I make time to, after all.

Endurance is a choice, and some factors are within my control, others are not. I am learning my high energy is sometimes not the right choice. I have, in fact, slowed down a bit. Falling over Spring Break was painful, not just on my butt and back. Its continual hurt stunted my running schedule (and pace, when I finally ran again yesterday) and my sense of self, a little. While I have MANY titles, “runner” is a core identity. Having to sit out of running for about 2 weeks wasn’t an ideal choice, but I had to consider the future ramifications if I didn’t rest. And so now I am slowly returning to running again, recognizing that 3 milers, instead of my standard 6 or 10, are okay for now. In tandem, with Girls on the Run not happening this semester, I am considering not participating in running events, either. GOTR’s 5k is not competitive, but as I’ve written about before, I am not a crowds-person. So finding a balance of resting and running is a new process of endurance.

Another endurance practice is focusing on equity, not equality. While I certainly value honesty and fairness, equity is more focused. Not everyone has the resources, to run, market, read, have a full-time job and multiple side-hustles like I do. So how can I use my talents, time, and energy to be a more equitable person and professional? I’m keeping my eye out for opportunities. I loved working at Ebenezer, a Milwaukee food pantry, so I’m hopeful new connections will lead somewhere where I help manage resources, such as helping redistribute food for those with houselessness. Perhaps my newfound fellow Ripon alum friends will have something? Or maybe I’ll meet people from these faith explorations?

Endurance also factors into friendships. While I’ve omitted a few people and environments against my belief systems, I initially felt lonely, but now that has turned into liberation. I’m building a network of people who share my values of spirituality, plant-based living, and independent work, and these relationships are so fulfilling. (Have you seen my /values webpage?) Many close friends are from my college, some are from PawsCo, and a few folks live in the Midwest. While I know not every relationship can be deep, I am learning how to tactfully share when individuals behave in potentially damaging ways. No-shows are not okay to me. I’ve been “nice” for so long, and now I recognize my energy is better suited to caring, honest people. Or just time with myself. Boundaries from people have been helpful, but so have bridges: I am so excited to see Marissa and finally meet her friends at her bachelorette party, and I can’t wait to reconnect with Cathy! These friends really have become my family.

I have a growth mindset, as I am absolutely driven to keep exploring, learning, and creating, but I need to be gentle with myself. This year of omitting and committing comes from a place of seeing what, who, and where feels right. And respecting that progress takes time, it’s all part of the process to be more authentically me. This is a long process of change through omitting:

• Bars don’t feel right
• Running is sometimes painful
• Perceiving plants as food (including protein!) and animals as animals, not food
• Dating sounds not helpful right now
• Having Big Life Talks when sharing is mutual
• Keeping social media sharing to a minimal and instead focusing energy on this website

My “inner compass” work is not a competition, and I hope it can become a collaborative practice. I am a very compassionate person, and in all of this writing and reflecting, I hope to help people see they’re not alone. Your stories and experiences matter! I’d love to see what you’re working on this year, whether it’s framed in a word for the year or even your thoughts of your own inner compass!