Welcome back to my series on open-hearted living. “Open-hearted” is my word for 2025, and every month, I dive into a different letter of the compound word.
How do I stay open-hearted while also being courageous to make change? When so many (queer, Black, brown, disabled, home-insecure) people are suffering, how can I show up?
Enter the various A-letter words sprinkled throughout this post: A is for actions I do, for and with others. Namely, open-hearted living includes advocacy, in the form of allyship.
Open-hearted is not just my word for the year; it’s my active practice of living my values. Likewise, being an ally is not just “thoughts and prayers” or the words you’re reading now. It’s taking action.
Some actions of allyship I’ve leaned into?
When I choose to opt out of Amazon and Starbucks, I’m an ally. The absence is not enough, either, so I choose shopping small. For example, I’m super-proud of my friend Cetonia’s Black bookstore Niche in my hometown of Milwaukee and actively seek out Black-owned businesses in my new home of Denver, like Whittier Cafe.
When I no longer support J.K. and recognize that even browsing a Harry Potter meme supports her transphobia, I choose my queer friends and remove that garbage from my feed. (Sorry, not sorry. As an artist myself, I am not very good at separately the art from the artist.)
When I re-learn Spanish at the pantry, I’m anti-racist. I check Google, and I ask my Spanish-speaking friends to verify. Palabra por palabra, word by word.
When I use this little ol’ platform to help myself and other readers recognize the systemic injustices of our Black brothers and sisters, that’s anti-racism.
Yet I can still do better.
Intersectionality and positionality matter. I am a cis white female who is able-bodied, sans some trouble with hearing and seeing. My whiteness is a privilege. So’s my stature, class, and gender. I generally don’t fear my safety. I’m seldom silenced. I don’t have to “talk white”.
However! Allyship demands decentering. I’ve made much of my journey in allyship about me. My discomfort of recognizing the roles I(‘ve) play(ed) in this system is a privilege. Especially compared to systemic injustice, day-to-day fear, and tokenism that’s misguided as representation. This process has made me angry, frustrated, and guilty… But now I’m not only more understanding, but I am also liberated.
So, I am still asking a ton of questions, listening to my friends’ experiences and checking in on them, reading So You Want to Talk about Race, and being empowered in taking action. Readers, give me more ideas! Together, we can all rise.